The 2 P's

There are two things in the world that absolute boggle me: politics and parents.

Now, I'm not talking about both at once or related at all, but the combination of the two could also be a problem. But let's focus on the two topics separately.

First of all, we have politics. Oh, lovely, lovely politics. It wouldn't be so bad if some viewpoints weren't so obviously crazy or religiously ridiculous. It wouldn't be so bad if there wasn't as much corruption as there was in the system. It's all about who gets the most money. That's all it comes to, really. I think a rather small percentage of the population actually cares about things like human rights, preserving the environment, gay marriage, worker's rights, improving public education, and so on and so forth. Lately, it's only been about public aid and unemployment and things that generally just revolve around money.

It's frustrating. So frustrating. There are good people in the world, obviously, but sometimes I feel as if the amount of good is far overshadowed by the bad.

In any case, it's worth noting that Obama is almost as far right as Romney is when you look at his policies. Funny thing, politics. Very funny.

(also I am slightly worried about foreign policies and stuff as well because "goodbye Hillary" and potential "hello disaster")

However, let's not delve too deeply into that mess, because it is just... a goddamn mess and I have no intentions of being tangled up right now.

BUT NOW!

Parents. Ah, parents. You have good, kind and caring parents. You have abusive, horrible, what-the-hell-are-doing parents. Then of course they all think they're always right.

Sometimes, I am one push away from walking out of the house and saying goodbye to my college funds, but at those times, the money is irrelevant and I want my own freedom and I want respect. I want peace in the place I live in. I want my home to be a home.

Then sometimes I know my parents are right. But I can't bring myself to change.

Then I wonder if I even love my parents at all. Sure, I do. But to what extent? I watched a dad playfully run out of the office the other day with his young son racing him. Not a smart move in an office building, but they were having so much fun and being affectionate that nobody would have said anything anyway. Is that what real parenting is like? Having fun with your kids? It seems like all I do with my parents is get into verbal debates. Our views are so different. Although it's not like we hate each other either.

'course, my good ol' man is just indifferent about everything. So I guess it's just my mother.

Ah, ramblings. Ramblingssssss

Here, have some yuri as an apology.

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And just when I thought everything was normal again!

I was having a perfectly average day. Floating through my first two periods, sleeping through my third, floating through the next, panicking in math class, going out to lunch...

Come gym period I am having a slightly above average day. Green and I are in giggling like mad from shenanigans (well, she giggled. I snickered. I'm not quite girly enough to giggle but not manly enough to chuckle either). Okay, fine, we're friends.

Then, as we go back up to the locker room to change (protip: never have the changing room locker NEXT TO THE PERSON YOU ARE ATTRACTED TO), she turns to me and says,"Oh! I have something to show you!"

Jokingly, I ask, "Does it involve clothes being thrown off?" Because, you know, we're going to the changing room. Duh.

I get a look of "really, Vanui, really?" and I shrug.

Turns out, she flips open her phone after we're both changed, and lo and behold, there's a picture of me on Santa's lap. My first reaction was to shout, at the top of my lungs, attracting all attention from the rest of the 50 or so girls crammed in there, "You took a picture?! Green!"

She giggles her way out of the locker room, telling me all the while how she had to go through so much trouble trying to get the company's phone to work and take a picture before finding time to text it to herself. Here I am going, "What the fuck why why why would you go through so much trouble to take a picture of me on Santa's lap" in my head.

So while we're on the subject of Santa, I learn that Santa told Green to "take care of Big Guy (oh lawd, he actually thought I was a dude)" and while I laughed it off, I really hope she didn't ask Santa, "Why do I need to take care of him/her?"

Because, well, uh...

If Santa revealed anything, Green would know it's her. And I really don't want to make things awkward like it was for us for the first 3 years of high school when I confessed to her 3 times. Jesus.

I don't even know. I just... I don't even.

Beauty?

For the first of my thoughts, I’d like to talk about something more personal and hope it can relate to you. It has to do with the perception of beauty.


I noticed that when I look at the girl I like, she just... glows in my vision. Her eyes sparkle, and I can’t pull away (at least not until I realize what I’m doing and I get embarrassed). Even when she got her new haircut and looked awful, I found that I eventually started to like her physical appearance just as much as her old one.

Does love blind? Because my other friends have agreed that she doesn’t look as great as before, but it’s not like she’s ugly either. My opinion gradually changed over time, and as I came to see her more, she simply seemed to get more and more attractive, especially as I got to talk with her this year more than I ever got to in the past (including all 7 years we’ve known one another). 

Maybe it has more to do with this emotional connection than anything else. We’ve never had so many classes together before (and by “so many”, I mean 2), and it’s a new experience to be able to talk with her every day for 50 or so minutes. So we’ll see. Certainly, things might become more clear as second semester approaches and I’m not in any of her classes anymore. 

Meh.